What three words generate the "bad screams" from all writers?
The Query Letter!
What prevents writers from becoming published authors?
The Query Letter.
What's next after a manuscript is completed and polished until it glows in the dark?
The Query Letter.
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. . . from author Bria Burton
Thanks to Molli’s guidance on my query letter, when
I "pitched" it to an agent and a publisher at a writers' conference, both requested manuscript submissions.                 
Back in the days when I was a Time-Life and acquisitions editor, I read and rejected hundreds of poorly written queries that contained one or all three  of the following mistakes that had doomed them to delete-ville.

So, WHAT'S in your query?
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Major Mistake #1:
Format your query to be delivered via snail-mail.
Do this instead!
  • Update your memory banks!
  • Give up all outdated query beliefs (prior to 2014).
  • Format your query submission to be agent-and-device friendly, easily read on multiple-sized screens from desktop to laptop to notepad to smart phone.
Major Mistake #2:
Blather on and on about how friends and family love your story.
Do this instead!
  • Begin your query by revealing what your protagonist (main character) wants and why they can't have it.
  • Hint at the terrible “or else” that might occur if the protagonist fails to get what they want.
Major Mistake #3:
Do not respond to the agent’s need to know W.I.I.F.M.
Do this instead!
  • Answer what all agents want to know . . . "What’s In It For Me?"
  • Demonstrate, via your perfectly crafted first-and-second query paragraphs, that you possess excellent writing skills.
  • Convince the agent that your story will attract readers by the thousands (and generate on-going income for them and their agency).
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 . . . from author C. Flood
Molli's a writers' alloy who melds writers to agents.    

Two successful queries~
Writers Emile and Liz struggled to craft query letters that would elicit positive agent response. They failed, over and over. However, my query letter template and a little one-on-one assistance helped them learn o craft agent-and-electronic device-friendly queries that did the job.
Emile's query:
Kidnapped at the age of 16, Maisy Sloane endured 27 horrifying days of torture and rape by a psychopath who murdered her best friend. Now 24 and a law student, she’s laser-focused on discovering how her attacker evaded death row, despite the overwhelming evidence of guilt. But, when the arrival of taunting messages from her torturer rips open old wounds, they force Maisy to set aside plans of revenge and confront the ghosts of her past.
Armed with a new name and an appetite for vengeance, Maisy accepts work in the office of Jacob Alexander, the attorney who kept her attacker off death row. Jacob’s reputation for defending criminals with deep pockets motivates Maisy to dig through his files, searching for proof that he circumvented the law. Despite her dogged investigation, Maisy finds no evidence of Jacob’s wrongdoing, and finally admits she’s misjudged him. But, as the flood of twisted love letters from the sadistic monster who imprisoned her escalate to accusations of betrayal and promises of reprisal, her head fills with memories she’s worked hard to bury. Uncontrollable panic attacks and debilitating nightmares drive Maisy to seek comfort in Jacob’s arms. As she wrestles with conflicting emotions toward the man who protected her rapist, death bides its time in the shadows, awaiting the opportunity to settle an old score.
27 Days is a work of romantic suspense, complete at 79,000 words. The market for this tale of courage and hope, in the face of overwhelming odds, includes readers who relish epic love stories as well as those drawn to mysteries and psychological thrillers. I’m an active member of Romance Writers of America, Sister’s in Crime, and The Southeastern Writer’s Association.
Liz's query:
It’s Christmas everywhere except in St. Jude Without, the isolated village which holds fast to its pagan roots on the coast of Newfoundland. Carmel Thrushley, a new resident to the community, stumbles upon the body of a local minister, garroted and left for dead in an icy field. When the second dead cleric shows up, murdered in the same fashion, she knows it can’t be a coincidence. She also knows she’s picked the wrong place to live a quiet life. Someone is murdering the religious leaders of the nearby town, and her friend, Rev. Sharran, might be next on the list. 
The murders began at the time of the winter solstice celebration, when local ruffians dress as “mummers,” drink to excess and enact mock battles. This mayhem resulted in the first murder. As Carmel comes to terms with the mysterious traditions in her new home, the police recognize her as a valuable asset. Carmel’s outsider status may help them penetrate the cloak of silence that meets their official inquiries. Yet as suspects provide ironclad alibis, the trail leads to her home and the strange new tenant who showed up just as the madness began. He might be the only one with opportunity and means to commit both murders. Too bad she’s already opened her mouth and told him what she knows. When she realizes what his motive could be, she has reason to fear, not only for her friend, but her own life.  
THE GARROT is a murder mystery complete at 70,000 words, and was short-listed in the 2016 Atlantic Writing Competition Unpublished Division (under its previous title Lord of Misrule). I have worked as a freelance writer and editor, and am a member of the Writers Alliance of Newfoundland and the Nova Scotia Federation of Writers.
COMMENT FROM MOLLI:
Although Liz deviated a bit from the traditional query format and told her story as "this happened, then that happened," she injected sufficient engaging information about her protagonist. It worked. Can't argue with success.
Take your next success step . . .
Request your copy of my query letter template which can help you:
  • Flatten your query learning curve.
  • Relax and enjoy the process as you practice writing an effective query.
  • Remove the uncertainty about what to put where.
  • Write a query letter that will inspire a top-notch agent to declare, "Hooray! Here's the writer I've been looking for. Let's celebrate. Order pizza!"
  • Move closer to the goals of your heart: agent/book contract/shelf space at Barnes and Noble.
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